Black Christmas/ Terror Train

The Hole (2009)

 The Hole

Release Date: 2009

Rating: * * *

By John Engell December 5, 2012
  

If horror had a recognized hall of fame, Joe Dante would unarguably have the honor of being one of its inaugural inductees. The man is horror royalty. His resume boasts no less than three genre classics, "Piranha," "The Howling," and his crowning achievement, "Gremlins." My personal favorite of his films is the 1985 sci-fi family adventure "Explorers" starring a pre-"Stand By Me" River Phoenix, God rest his soul. But just because Dante already made his mark and his millions, didn't mean the man was content to walk away from the medium. After a five year span of infrequent activity, discounting his directing the wraparound story of the abysmal anthology "Trapped Ashes" and two episodes of the superb, but short-lived Showtime series "Masters of Horror," Dante made his return. Well sort of... Although "The Hole" was filmed in 2009, it didn't see the light of day domestically until this October. Something to do with distribution and after it did finally find a deal in the states, fans were dumped on with a disappointing release. Despite being filmed in 3-D, unknown Big Air Studios' wretched DVD is presented in only two dimensions and doesn't even include a commentary track for cripes sake.

But I digress, back to the movie. Single mother Susan (Teri Polo of "Meet the Parents") relocates her boys Dane and Lucas (Nathan Gamble of "The Mist") from the city to the burbs for a fresh start. Enter sexy next door neighbor girl Julie (PG-13 horror alum Haley Bennett, "The Haunting of Molly Hartley"). In the movies you move and a cute and curious coed shows up to help you unpack. In real life your new neighbors call the cops on you because your dog is barking too loud. But that is neither here nor there. It quick order, the unsupervised brothers and Julie begin to explore the house, where they happen upon a hole in the basement. Hidden beneath a heavily padlocked trapdoor, it's no ordinary hole. It's as dark as death and it seemingly has no bottom.

The premise of "The Hole" is an age old one. The hole is a Pandora's box of sorts. The unseen evil that resides in its blackness, feeds on its unwitting victim's fears. For Julie that dread surrounds the tragic and emotionally unresolved death of a childhood friend (Quinn Lord of the aforementioned "Trick 'r Treat" plays the deceased girl). Lucas has a much simpler fear, clowns, and Dane, he is scared their abusive father, who is responsible for their constant carousel of changing addresses, and who is freshly out of prison , may find the family. All their nightmares manifest themselves in different and disturbing ways. But when Dane's worst fear is realized and his brother is dragged down into the dark depths of the hole, he must decide to continue to run, or to finally stay and fight.

"The Hole" is a return to form from a true vet. Like Carpenter with "The Ward," Dante decided to direct a simple, but solid story with a marginal yet manageable amount of money. The result? A mostly positive supernatural tale, aided by slick photography, and a man familiar with his craft. Now if only we could get a proper release the way Dante intended the film to be seen. Here's hoping...

Deadly Friend (1986)

Deadly Friend

Release Date: 1986

Rating: * * *

By John Engell November 28, 2012
   
There have been more than a few famous robots featured prominently in film. There was R2-D2, Johnny Five, Optimus Prime…
One mechanical man you may not be familiar with is DD (voiced by Charles Fleischer, who is also responsible for giving life to Roger Rabbit), the brainchild of boy genius Paul Conway in Wes Craven’s little seen dramatic horror movie “Deadly Friend.”

Paul (Matthew Labyorteaux), his single mother, and his yellow marvel of artificial intelligence, move to small town USA so Paul can study at the local college.

Paul befriends the paperboy Tom (Michael Sharrett) and falls for Samantha (Kristy Swanson), the pretty, repressed girl next door who is abused by her alcoholic, sexually predatory father Harry.
On the night of October thirty-first, the trio with BB in tow, decide to pull an ill-fated prank on the shotgun carrying crazy across the street (played by Anne Ramsey of “The Goonies”). And after the lamest attempt at mischief in Halloween night history, (Samantha shaving cremes a car in the deserted street and the three juvenile delinquents trespass on said neighbor’s property apparently just to trick or treat), BB is blown to bits by the angry, bullish woman.

As grief stricken Paul attempts to cope with the loss of his best friend, Sam’s dear dad kills her in a drunken, jealous, fit of rage.
Catastrophes come in threes and Paul uses that big brain of his and resolves to steal Sam’s body from the hospital in hopes of reanimating it. After smuggling his love’s lifeless corpse to his garage, he goes all Frankenstein and implants the dead girl with the central computing chip from his destroyed robot. Sam is indeed resurrected, but she has become an abomination, an unnatural hybrid of woman and machine, intent on getting revenge on any who have wronged her or her metallic alter ego.

Long time Craven collaborator Tony Cecere coordinated the film’s stunts, which include a particularly gruesome, if not altogether impossible decapitation (or more appropriately, full on cranial explosion) by basketball. Charles Bernstein reunited with Craven to compose the film’s score.

“Deadly Friend,” like “Deadly Blessing” (see review here on Favorite Scary Movie Reviews) released five years prior, has an over-the-top “shock” ending that characterizes Craven’s early work. By all accounts, Craven loathed the ending of ANOES that the studio allegedly forced upon him, so I would be curious to know whether “Deadly Friend’s” ending was his work or some big-wig’s back-seat directing. 

In 2007 Warner Brothers released a handful of cult classics to dvd for the first time, and packaged them as part of their ‘Twister Terror Collection.’ The set included amongst other titles, “Eyes of a Stranger” featuring the special effects of a young Tom Savini, “Someone’s Watching Me,” John Carpenter’s segue to “Halloween,” and Wes Craven’s “Deadly Friend.”
 
A must see and own for all Craven completists, "Deadly Friend" is a fun and campy example of the master’s low-to-no budget brand of film-making that began with “Last House On the Left” and died with “New Nightmare.”    

Journey for Jamie Lee

By John Engell

The last two weeks I have neglected this blog and you followers, as I have concentrated all my energies on planning an important road trip. I apologize, sincerely, but I am back after the completion of a long journey, that I hope you enjoy reading about as much as I enjoyed making...

Earlier this year HorrorHound (my preferred horror magazine and the mid-west's premier horror con) announced that the original Scream Queen herself, Jamie Lee Curtis, would be making her first and only convention appearance at a special HorrorHound Weekend celebrating her contribution to the genre. Previously the horror community was largely resigned to never meeting the "Halloween" star, as it was held that the actress-turned-children's-book-author, had denounced her horror roots and distanced herself from the films that made her famous. But thanks to HH, and Sean Clark and his company Convention All-Stars, an impossibility became a reality for thousands of horror fans this weekend in Indianapolis.
And I had the thrill of being in attendance.

My journey began on November the eleventh when I stopped procrastinating and purchased my ticket to this once-in-a-lifetime event. Due to demand, HorrorHound offered JLC autograph vouchers and photo ops pre-sale, online only. Unbeknownst to me, I secured mine mere hours before they went off sale. I then made the necessary arrangements. I rented a car (I was given a black 2012 Mazda 6 that drove like a dream), and reserved a room at a property adjacent to the host hotel, which was unsurprisingly sold out. After a light breakfast, I got on the road at noon on Saturday the sixteenth and began the trek to Indiana- an 11 hour drive from Upstate New York. I arrived at the Inn at half past ten. The room was basic, but serviceable and after a quick soak to ease the aching bones, I hit the sack with a couple of Wendy's hamburgers for linner and some ESPN college football on TV.

I Woke up at 8:30 Sunday morning, showered, snagged a breakfast bar, checked out, and walked across the parking lot to the con. There was very little traffic when I entered. Some people were milling around including Charles Cyphers, who had mistakenly showed an hour early, and several groups had already congregated. Got in line to redeem my tickets at around 9:30 AM. Waited till nearly 11 before I had that golden ticket in my hand, at which time the line behind me had ballooned to a hundred people deep or more. By now the main hallway was crowded and there was a general confusion as to what lines were for what and for whom. The staff admirably attempted to direct the mob, but ultimately is was HorrorHound's own Editor-In-Chief Nathan Hanneman, who announced that JLC would be signing in order of the number on each patron's ticket. There was a dry erase board outside the entrance to the conference room where Jamie was signing that Nathan updated regularly to reflect the latest ticket holders to be allowed in. My particular number was halfway down the list, so I had my photo-op first.

Got herded into her auditorium at noonish and had my pic taken with Jamie at approximately quarter after one.The photo-ops were held in a separate room right down the hall. When I approached her she said "Hey, I remember you!" which I got a kick out of because I had obviously never met her before. The photo-op company did an excellent job keeping things moving and everyone seemed pleased with the final product, myself included. Did manage do add one more guest to my collection- Will Sandin AKA the first Michael Myers, who barely said a word to me and seemed annoyed when the first photo a gentleman graciously took for me of Will and I came out blurry and I asked to snap another. The second one also came out bad, but I said forget it and walked away. Spent the next several hours waiting to get my autograph. Had JLC sign a pricey piece of hand made paper I picked up at the craft store. I didn't want her signature to get lost on a large poster or have to compete with a background image. I couldn't be happier with the result. 

Jamie was amicable, although she was agitated at the mass of people still waiting in line with less than 2 hours till the designated end time of the convention (I would estimate 300 patient faces). When I told her I believed people were still entering the aud, she admonished the staff and demanded to know how many tickets had been sold for Sunday because she was "busting my ass" to get through the line in order to finish (presumably to catch a flight). She said she would soon only be signing her name to speed proceedings up. Fortunately my autograph was made out to me and she even included her character's name "Laurie Strode."

But there in lies the problem with attending any convention on its last day. You pay the same price as the previous day's ticket holders, but you surely don't get the same experience. According to numerous accounts, and Facebook posts by the event organizers themselves, Saturday JLC was dedicating several minutes with each attendee, and even personalizing their items with movie quotes (A similar situation occurred to me when I met Robert Englund, who went from taking posed photos with people at the start of the day to not taking photos with people at all by the day's end). Not to sound ungrateful, it it just a shame that despite knowing the exact number of tickets sold, and the amount of time that JLC would be signing each day, that the convention couldn't have determined an average amount of time that she could spend with each attendee to insure everyone got what they paid for as well as have the opportunity to share a moment with her. After all "it's not their first rodeo." But I digress. It may seem crazy to some people, hell most people, to spend all that money and time driving, and waiting in lengthy lines, for literally only seconds, but I have no regrets. This was truly a piece of horror history and I am honored to have had a small part in it. 

I walked off JLC's stage at 3:30 in the afternoon and immediately exited the building with a smile on my face. Got gas and purchased provisions- Gatorade, a couple Five Hour Energy Shots (New Pink Lemonade flavor) and a bag of beef jerky, and got back on the open road. Pulled in my driveway, exhausted, just shy of 2:30 AM Monday morning.

Jamie Lee Curtis donated all the proceeds from the show to the Children's Hospital of Los Angeles. And she revealed during her panel that she had even purchased her own airfare. Sean Clark recently addressed rumors regarding his cut of the profits on social media, where he has clarified that he too has donated his share to the hospital. Both are class acts and I am thankful for their efforts. It was truly a special time.
Other conventions take notice. The bar has been raised...

Happy Halloween!

...Or All Hallows Eve. October Thirty-first. One of my favorite days on the calendar.

Next year will mark the 35th anniversary of John Carpenter's immortal "Halloween"; The definitive film on the holiday. Aside from being recognized as one of the most successful independent films ever made, "Halloween" has the honor and distinction of birthing the slasher. Hardcore horror buffs will debate that "Halloween" is not the first in its family tree, but a descendent of other genre pictures such as "Peeping Tom," "Psycho," "Black Christmas," and any number of Italian Giallos. But if "Halloween" didn't invent the formula, it certainty did perfect it.

As has been extensively and exhaustively documented, "Halloween" facilitated filmmaker's attack on every other holiday from April Fool's Day to Valentines. "Halloween" itself spawned 7 sequels and 2 remakes. Yet despite the holiday's seemingly infinite profit potential, few have ventured outside the confines of that franchise to explore it, and even fewer of those have succeeded.

Well it took nearly 30 years, but in 2007 someone finally made a movie worthy of being a companion to "Halloween" on this night of scary movie viewing. That someone is Michael Dougherty (whose previous credits include scripting several superhero flicks) and the movie is "Trick 'r Treat."

In five short years "Trick 'r Treat" has already achieved cult status. In spite of its lack of a formal theatrical release, it has found a home in most horror geek's libraries with its DVD and Blu-ray releases (I double-dipped and bought both). But on the off chance you haven't been introduced to this beauty...
Scary movie lovers, I give to you...

Trick 'r Treat

Release Date: 2007

Rating: * * * *

By John Engell October 31, 2012

 I'm going to keep this short and sweeter than a pillowcase of Halloween candy. "Trick 'r Treat" is an anthology film, in the tradition of "Creepshow." Four interwoven tales with a wraparound story. The chronicles concern a school principal who takes his love for the holiday too far, a lonely young lady looking for the right man, a clique of adolescent pranksters whose latest stunt results in tragedy, and an old man whose checkered past has finally come back to haunt him. The tales all take place on Halloween night and are brilliantly atmospheric. The animations, the cinematography, the music, are all tops and the talented Anna Paquin ("True Blood" and "Scream 4") is featured prominently in one of the story arcs. It is hard to review a film you consider a masterpiece and it would be a disservice to anyone who hasn't yet had the pleasure of seeing "Trick 'r Treat" to reveal anymore. So suffice to say "Trick 'r Treat" should be on your short list of essential holiday viewing. After watching it countless times myself, my only complaint... at only 82 minutes long, it's over too soon.

Waxwork (1988)

Waxwork

Release Date: 1988

Rating: * * *

By John Engell October 24, 2012

7 more days till Halloween, Halloween, Halloween...Yours truly has been busy carving pumpkins and gorging myself on candy, and writing reviews of course. This treat I've been saving for just the right time.

                              (My 2012 pumpkin- Sam from "Trick 'r Treat")

A precursor to and perhaps a prototype of “Scream” and the savvy self-aware horror film, “Waxwork” (1988) stars Zach Galligan of “Gremlins” fame, in his second most recognized role. Galligan hams it up as Mark Loftmore, a wealthy prima donna who agrees to accompany his friends to the premiere of a new wax museum. David Warner (“The Omen”) lends some credibility to this budget production with his performance as the proprietor of the exhibit.

The waxwork features 18 scenes depicting the genre’s most storied characters. Incidentally each display has the ability to teleport any patron who ventures past its velvet ropes, to the place and time it illustrates. Two of the visitors quickly disappear including Tony, (Dana Ashbrook from tv’s “Twin Peaks”) who enters one of the sets in an attempt to retrieve his lost lighter and ends up in a dark wood, mauled by a werewolf, played by John Rhys-Davies AKA Gimli from the “Lord of the Rings” trilogy.

The surviving pair, Mark (Galligan) and Sarah (Deborah Foreman who starred as Muffy/Buffy in the slasher parody “April Fool’s Day”) search for their friends to no avail and hesitantly leave the waxwork without them. They become increasingly concerned the following day when they fail to reach them. Mark swears he recognizes the waxwork man and decides to dig up his family’s dusty newspaper collection that details his grandfather’s death. The clippings lead the pair to the old man’s former friend, a crippled codger named Sir Wilfred, who spins a yarn about helping Mark’s relation collect pieces from the evilest people who have ever lived; artifacts that were long ago stolen by a man named Lincoln AKA the museum man. He apparently plans to use them in conjunction with the souls of his hapless victims, to bring his creations to life. Hope that wasn’t as convoluted to read as it was to watch and write.

Regardless “Waxwork’s” plot serves only as a means to an end, which in this case is a monster brawl in the museum between the resurrected villains and a geriatric army intent to stop them.
Kane “Jason” Hodder was responsible for stunts on "Waxwork" and apparently the film’s original script made numerous references to the Friday the 13th franchise and other horror mainstays, which were ultimately cut for legal reasons.

Still “Waxwork” was a pleasant surprise and thanks to Lionsgate it is now readily available. The company released the film as part of its infamous Horror Collection 8 Movie Pack earlier this year. More on that set next week!

31 Days of Halloween

I've been so preoccupied with this month's festivities that I forgot to publish last week's Wednesday post. Halloween truly is the "holiday season" for horror fans. Now is the time to shop for your collection.
Best Buy, FYE, and one of my personal favorites Big Lots!, are all stocked with horror DVDs and blu-rays, from new mainstream fare to the downright obscure, but all at deeply discounted prices!
Today alone I snagged some serious swag- a couple Craven flicks, "Deadly Friend" and "The People Under the Stairs," and an old out-of-print release of "Pumkinhead," all for under $20.

I have such a large library of movies that I frequently find I'm too indecisive to choose something to watch, particularly this time of year! That is why I determined to collaborate with my father and create my very own
"31 Days of Halloween." A spinoff of what's on TV, only featuring the films I actually wanted to see.
A movie every night for the entire month of October.

And for my inaugural lineup...

1.) "Friday the 13th Part 3D"
2.) "Cabin Fever"
3.) "Poltergeist"
4.) "Salem's Lot"
5.) "Child's Play"
6.) "Halloween Town" (A childhood favorite)
7.) "Urban Legend"
8.) "An American Werewolf In London"
9.) "Night of the Living Dead"
10.) "Pet Sematary"
11.) "Hostel"
12.) "Friday the 13th Part 4"
13.) "The Strangers"
14.) "Hocus Pocus"
15.) "Saw"
16.) "Halloween Town 2"
17.) R.Z. "Halloween"
18.) "Mulberry Street"
19.) "Halloween 3: Season of the Witch"
20.) "A Nightmare on Elm Street"
21.) "Sleepy Hallow"
22.) "Scream 4"
23.) "John Carpenter's Halloween"
24.) "Terror Train"
25.) "The Fog"
26.) "Dawn of the Dead"
27.) R.Z. "Halloween 2"
28.) "Trick 'R Treat"
29.) "A Nightmare On Elm Street 2"
30.) "Halloween 2"
31.) "Halloween H20"

 What are your Halloween traditions?
And I suppose there's no better time to ask...What's your favorite scary movie?

The Reef (2010)

The Reef

Release Date: 2010

Rating: * * *

By John Engell October 3, 2012
  
The shark movie; a niche in the horror genre characterized by a classic. There hasn’t been a shark movie released in the wake of Stephen Spielberg’s “Jaws,” that has survived the inevitable and unfair comparison to that film. To make a serious shark movie is an unenviable undertaking. By their very nature they are condemned as inferior copycats. In 2004 “Open Water” scored well with the critics earning favorable reviews from many mainstream publications, even receiving “Two Thumbs Up!” from Ebert and Roeper. Many moviegoers however, smelt blood in the water and tore the film apart. “Open Water” currently owns a pedestrian 2.7 star user rating out of a possible 5 stars, on Amazon.com.
    
“The Reef” however, made much less of a wave. In fact I was unaware of its existence until I went on a “Jaws” kick recently, which led me to Barnes and Noble to purchase its sequel and to Google to search for similar shark movies. It’s a foreign film, shot on location in the waters off Australia, with homegrown actors. “Open Water” looked like an inexpensive documentary (shark snuff if you will). “The Reef” maintains that voyeuristic perspective, but (through excellent editing) gives the viewer the rather uncomfortable feeling of being one of the victims rather than a casual onlooker to the carnage. The cinematography is breathtakingly beautiful and the filmmaker’s decision not to use animatronics (“Jaws”) or stock shark footage (“Open Water”) makes “The Reef” feel infinitely more real. In fact the shark attacks (I don’t assume that is a spoiler. Of course there had to be at least one shark attack in a shark movie) are so real I purposely didn’t watch the dvd’s "making of" feature because I didn’t want to know how they made it look so damn good. 
   
The set up- four friends and a sun kissed sea salt, decide to mix business with pleasure and set sail on Australia’s Great Barrier Reef. Our lead Luke, played by Damian Walshe-Howling (Yes, his name is awesome), has been contracted to deliver the vessel, but he has brought along his on-again off-again girlfriend Kate, her brother and his best mate Matt, and his fiancé Suzie for a bit of a holiday. But after drinking a few brews and catching some rays, their boat hits the reef and capsizes. After the group scrambles onto the boat’s severely compromised hull, they must make a dreadfully difficult decision. Either stay put on a suspect ship that may sink and let the currents drag them out into the open ocean or swim for it. Prior to the accident the group had been bathing on a small island that Luke is convinced is only 10 to 15 miles back. But the waters are shark infested, which the hired skipper/deckhand ominously points out to the ship’s petrified passengers before they take the plunge. That is really the extent of the plot. Then it's shark time. 

So what is it about shark movies that make them so popular? For me it's that pure and primal fear of the unknown. I find the thought of drifting in cold, dark water that seems endless and bottomless, completely exposed and vulnerable to its killing machines, to be more terrifying than any masked serial killer. What do you think?
 

The Convent (2000)

The Convent  

Release Date: 2000

Rating: * * 1/2

By John Engell September 26, 2012
 
I first read about “The Convent” earlier this year via Adrienne Barbeau’s Facebook page, when she linked to an article on Fear Net entitled “Six Obscure Horror Gems from the 2000’s.” I had only previously heard of one of the titles on the list, although I have subsequently acquired several of the others, which may just end up being covered here on Favorite Scary Movie Reviews. Anyway I picked up “The Convent” at the Scare-A-Cuse con from one of its vendors for a mere $5 used.
  
According to that aforementioned article, what makes 2000’s “The Convent” so obscure is its lack of a domestic theatrical release, as well as its large absence from the video rental market. Apparently the film’s beginning sequence, which involves a leather clad chick’s bludgeoning, burning, and shotgun shooting of a church full of nuns, was too much for Blockbuster to stomach, as the company refused to carry it on their shelves. So Lions Gate’s DVD release a year later was and really is the only way to enjoy this horror comedy cheese-fest.
  
That oft considered offensive opening shouldn’t be that off-putting, as it turns out the clergy in question was really a congregation of toothy vampires that had taken up residence in God’s house. That initial massacre sends the vanquisher of the vamps, a girl named Christine, to the nuthouse for the next 30 years. Her story becomes local legend and the scene of the crime becomes a popular destination for your stock high and horny school kids looking for some excitement. Well needless to say our motley crew finds said excitement after a botched ritual turns one of the young people into a member of the undead. Carnage ensues and a good deal of fluorescent blood, illuminated under the production’s black lighting setup, is spilt. As her friend’s continue to turn, our heroine Clorissa escapes the convent and enlists the help of adult Christine, played to perfection by genre vet Barbeau, who comes to the church and kicks some serious ass. Sadly haven’t seen Adrienne in a role like this since the 80’s (“Swamp Thing” comes to mind), but here's hoping...

It is easy to see why some consider “The Convent” to be a straight comedy, as the scares are non existent. The characters are amusing however, particularly the town’s two police officers played hilariously by Bill Moseley (“House of 1,000 Corpses”) and 90’s Billboard chart-topper Coolio! Pitty those scene stealers weren’t in more of the movie, but at a manageable 80 minute run time, the film’s not much of a commitment.

Director Mike Mendez’s next feature is not nearly as obscure as “The Convent.” 2006’s “The Gravedancers,” was included by After Dark Films in its inaugural horror fest, and received a healthy dvd release as part of the original "8 Films To Die For."

Scare-A-Cuse 2012

By John Engell September 19, 2012

As I mention in my profile, I attend numerous horror conventions throughout the calendar year. Most of those excursions entail hours of travel time to surrounding states (New York is not a horror hotbed) and a good deal of expense (the ever rising cost of gas, and tolls). So needless to say I was excited when I read several months ago that Upstate New York would be hosting its very own event entitled Scare-A-Cuse, and I was impressed when I saw the guest list (many of whom I had never met before) for this regional con in only its second year of existence. With less than a 45-minute drive from my front door to the venue, I decided to purchase a full 4-day pass. Thursday night featured a mixer, but Friday kicked things off.

That morning I sat in on my first panel, which I have always passed on prior purely due to time constraints. Because the con began early on Friday opposed to the more traditional evening start time, celebs were slow to show. It was a good half hour into proceedings before all four participants had made an appearance. Michael Berryman of Wes Craven's "Hills Have Eyes," dominated the conversation, which was very informal. The discussion was entertaining, but not terribly informative as the questions posed to the celebs by the audience dealt primarily with how to succeed in the industry. Then Michael went off on an old grudge about being mislead into thinking he would be cast in the "Hills" remake, which coincidentally I had already heard almost word for word the night before when I put in my Region 2 Arrow Video copy of "Deadly Blessing" and listened to Berryman's interview included in the bonus features. Without a moderator things quickly denigrated into a bitch session.

From there I hit the floor and browsed the vendors- another activity I rarely have the time to really enjoy. There were far fewer booths than the larger cons, but perhaps that helped quell my spending. I did purchase several cheapo dvds for my collection- Three documentaries from a budget indie distribution studio called SRS Cinema (how budget? The dvd sleeves have other titles printed on the reverse side); One on John Russo's film-making, one on Tom Savini's makeup effects, and one on the 25th Anniversary of "Night of the Living Dead" convention. Also snagged a used copy of "The Convent" starring Adrienne Barbeau, which will be reviewed here next week. Got a Freddy figure and couple different copies of the 100th issue of "The Walking Dead."

Then it was time for autographs. Highlights? - Adding Judith O'Dea's sig to my "NOTLD" poster, and meeting the beautiful Barbara Nedeljakova of "Hostel" fame.

Cheers

Cheers to John Russo for not being rigid with his pricing. The majority of convention celebs charge a flat fee for an autograph (typically $20) whether it be on something of theirs or an item of your own . Celebrity's refusal to tier their pricing ie. $10 for your item signed (logical seeing as it doesn't cost the celeb anything other than a few seconds of their time) or $20 for anything on my table signed (makes sense taking into consideration the cost they incur at printers) has deterred me from getting many guests. When I told Russo what I was interested in (the original screenplay for "Return of the Living Dead," his novel "The Awakening" and a poster for his film "Midnight"), he bundled the items for a very reasonable price. He made money, and is now receiving free publicity, and I left happy and as an even bigger fan of his work.

Cheers to Derek Mears, who now resides in my top 5 convention experiences of all time. I must confess I had passed on him before (which I now regret), once again because of lack of coin. Derek was an absolute pleasure. He took his time with each fan in his line. He patiently answered questions even the mundane ones. He graciously discussed Wes Craven's "Cursed" with me, in which he played the werewolf. He was a gentleman to all and a model by which most celebrities at these conventions could learn a thing or two from in regards to how to treat their fans. Speaking of which...

Jeers

Jeers to Danielle Harris. Danielle was late to the floor Friday despite the fact that the convention technically began Thursday. No matter, I had that full event pass so I returned Saturday with the sole intent of meeting Danielle. When I approached her table (the area was as barren as a post-apocalyptic wasteland) she had her face buried in her cell phone. I had to say hello twice before she would even acknowledge me (she asked me to hold on, before she lost her thought). I would have left at that point if her handler didn't already have my twenty bucks. She then scribbled her name on my dvd cover (after asking me several times what my name was), answered a couple questions I had about the film (I typically forgo questions while getting a graph out of courtesy to my fellow fans who are waiting), but since there was no one in sight I figured what the hell. She answered the questions briefly, one of which concerned filming locations for the epic "Stakeland." When she said the Catskill Mountains, I replied "Oh, so close by?" and her response was "I don't know where we are." Hhmmm. Danielle I've said it before about other celebs and I'll say it to you again. If conventions are an imposition to you and your schedule, if they impede upon your personal life, if you have better things to do then by all means do your fans a favor, and don't take their money.

Notwithstanding, Scare-A-Cuse was a success and an event I will pen in on my next year's horror convention calendar!

The Stuff (1985)

The Stuff

Release Date: 1985

Rating: * * * 1/2

By John Engell September 12, 2012 

From Master of Horror Larry Cohen ("It's Alive") comes "The Stuff." The Stuff in question is a white, fluff-like substance that springs naturally from the Earth. After the delicious goop is discovered it is quickly put into distribution and marketed to the masses as a tasty, low-calorie alternative to ice cream. Junk food bigwigs get nervous over their new competition, and after their failed attempts to analyze the goo or convince insiders to talk about it, they hire former FBI agent turned spy Mo Rutherford (the marvelous Michael Moriarty) to find the secret to the Stuff.
    
Turns out the Stuff is as addictive and dangerous as any drug. It has infiltrated and compromised the FDA and it is poisoning the public. It is a parasite in need of a host, and it’s turning the community into veritable “pod people.” Rutherford is able to convince Nicole, the PR person behind the product, to accompany him on his campaign to stop the Stuff. They are joined on their journey by disgruntled out-of-work businessman Chocolate Chip Charlie, a paranoid  recluse, Colonel Malcolm Grommett Spears and Jason, a young boy who was suspect of the Stuff from the beginning and has subsequently escaped his home after his parents and brother were turned into “stuffies.” With much memorable dialogue and true blue-collar special effects, "The Stuff" has an ending as satisfying as any dessert. 
    
"The Stuff" is quintessential 80’s filmmaking. It is clearly a statement on American consumerism and our craze happy culture’s desire to conform. But social commentary aside, this is a real gem of the genre. Well written, and real fun to watch. For this type of fare, "The Stuff" receives a well deserved A. They just don’t make them like this anymore.

The Devonsville Terror (1983)

The Devonsville Terror

Release Date: 1983

Rating: * *

By John Engell September 5, 2012

It is fair to say that director Ulli Lommel is a hack. The man has spent the last ten years of his film-making tenure churning out direct-to-video schlock on every serial killer committed to memory. His 2004 film “Zombie Nation” has the dishonor of being in the top ten of IMDB’s Bottom 100, with the shamefully low user rating of 1.6. Lommel however, has good company on that list. The late great Bob Clark, the maverick visionary responsible for “A Christmas Story,” amongst other cult classics, sits at its three spot with his final film “Superbabies: Baby Geniuses 2,” also released in 2004. Like Clark, who began his career with horror favorites such as “Death Dream” and “Black Christmas,” Lommel too had his moment, albeit fleeting and rather forgettable.
   
His 1980 opus “Boogeyman,” is the highlight of his lackluster career. Made during the post-“Halloween” boom when every two-bit wannabe with a camera jumped on the body count bandwagon, “Boogeyman” is a passable slasher-by-numbers. Nevertheless, it can be argued that one of Lommel’s follow-up efforts, 1983’s “The Devonsville Terror,” is the best example of the director’s no budget, no talent brand of movie making.
   
The film is set in the late seventeenth century New England town of Devonsville, where a hasty inquisition results in the murder of three women deemed by the locals to be witches. The first of the accused is eaten by swine, the second is bound to a wheel and rolled down an embankment to her grisly death and the third is burned at the stake. As the last persecuted woman is set ablaze, she puts a curse on the townspeople. Fast forward 300 years later when a Devonsville man suffocates his nagging wife and unknowingly unleashes the vengeful spirit.
   
After he reprised his role as Doctor Samuel Loomis in the much anticipated sequel to John Carpenter’s “Halloween” only two years prior, Donald Pleasance inexplicably appears in this amateurish attempt, once again cast as a man of medicine. Pleasance plays Dr. Warley, Devonsville’s primary physician, and a man obsessed with his ancestors. His relations have passed to him stories of the inquisition, and a sickening flesh disease where worms bore holes in his skin from the inside out. Warley becomes fixated on the town’s old witch hunt and rather unethically hypnotizes his patients to transport them back to that fateful day (Not really sure how that works). 
   
Regardless, when three strong women move into town, a disc jockey, a scientist, and a school teacher, the chauvinistic and superstitious men of the community believe they are reincarnations of the witches and are quick to exact some vigilante justice on the strangers.
   
Despite its clear monetary restrictions, “The Devonsville Terror” has one heck of a finale, with special fx that any B movie fan can appreciate. It is quite obscure. Aside from VHS, it was released in ‘99 by Anchor Bay as a DVD double feature with the aforementioned “Boogeyman.” That disc is now out of print, but can be tracked down on Amazon or Ebay or at your local used entertainment store, which is where I found my copy. Make no mistake, “The Devonsville Terror” is no Bob Clark movie, but it isn’t a bad way for genre fans to spend 80 minutes.

Deadly Blessing (1981)

Deadly Blessing

Release Date: 1981

Rating: * * 1/2

By John Engell August 29, 2012

Three years before Wes Craven would become a household name in horror with “A Nightmare On Elm Street,” he directed 1981’s little known “Deadly Blessing.” It is arguably the most atypical genre film in Craven’s cannon. The film features an early performance from Academy Award nominee Sharon Stone, and a score from future Titanic composer and Oscar winner James Horner.     

“Deadly Blessing” takes place in rural Pennsylvania farm country where a suspicious Amish-like sect known as the Hittites make their home. The late Ernest Borgnine stars as Isaiah, the leader of the group, whose son Jim decides to leave the tight-knit community to pursue a college education. When Jim returns to the family’s farmland with a wife, and a new perspective on life in which he embraces modern conveniences, he is exiled from the commune. The Hittites call his land the “forbidden place” and warn its youth from venturing onto it. On the night of the couple’s one year anniversary, a shadowy figure appears on the outsider’s property and murders Jim, crushing him with his own tractor.
    
His pregnant widow Martha is ostracized by the locals who call her a messenger of the Incubus. Despite warnings from police to leave town for her own safety, Martha refuses to be driven out.
    
Relations between Isaiah and his estranged daughter-in-law are further strained when one of the Hittites, a man-child played by the “Hill Have Eyes” alum Michael Berryman, is found dead on Martha’s property.
    
After Martha’s two best friends come to stay with her, the trio is terrorized by an unknown assailant, which viewers are led to assume is a member of the Hittite clan intent to purge the land of the evil they believe is incarnated there.
    
“Deadly Blessing” features several creepy and disquieting sequences involving a large spider, first in the barn and later when an arachnid descends from the ceiling into the open mouth of one of the unsuspecting girls as she lies restlessly in bed. There is also a gross-out snake in the bathtub scene reminiscent of Nancy’s scary soak in “Nightmare.”
    
The ending is a bit surreal and without revealing too much it involves a hermaphrodite, an overprotective mother and the devil himself. But don’t let that scare you away from tracking down a copy of one of Wes Craven’s most obscure efforts. “Deadly Blessing” may not be everyone’s glass of farm fresh milk, but it was unique enough to maintain my interest for 100 minutes.
    
Presently there is no region 1 issue of “Deadly Blessing” (I watched a dark, and grainy full-screen dub which just started to stream on Netflix), but the upstart Scream Factory label plans to remedy that this fall with a proper release of the film here in the States.

Staunton Hill (2009)

Staunton Hill

Release Date: 2009

Rating: * 1/2

By John Engell August 22, 2012

Like father like son. Well... not always. More like “my (insert relation) is a famous filmmaker so I can be one too.” Thus is the case with Cameron (son of legend George) Romero who decided to follow in his dear
dad’s footsteps and make movies. They are big shoes Cameron fails to fill with his 2009 direct-to-dvd dud “Staunton Hill.”

The film isn’t all bad although it is clearly inspired by Tobe Hooper’s oft-imitated “Texas Chainsaw Massacre.” Set around the same time as that landmark, a group of young pretty people are hitchhiking to a rally in the nation’s capital, before they accept a ride from an overzealous stranger whose truck breaks down. He then takes the group on a cross-country detour to the isolated farmhouse of the Staunton’s, who unbeknownst to them, are intermediaries in the sale of black market body parts. The matriarch of the household, played by Kathy Lamkin of the “TCM” remake, who more or less reprises that role here, has her mentally-handicapped son Buddy (Leatherface minus the mask and mechanical saw) harvest the requested organs from the outlanders for a Dr. Ostergard. The good doctor has circumvented the medicinal world’s waiting list by performing his own seedy back alley surgeries, which we get glimpses of with several cut scenes.

Romero spends the first 45 minutes of his film on its cardboard characters, who before getting stalked and slashed, do a lot of talking and walking around the barn, but don’t develop much depth. When we finally do get moving “Staunton Hill” is marginally interesting, but is ultimately an exercise in unoriginality. Romero must have believed his composition was as thought-provoking as say “The Sixth Sense,” since he insists on spelling things out to us with numerous annoying and unnecessary flashbacks (Otherwise we would have never known that the shady stranger who innocently led the group to the farm was somehow in on it).

The best parts of “Staunton Hill”? Decent cinematography, a cameo from "The Funhouse’s" Cooper Huckabee, and its awesome Anchor Bay cover art complete with ringing endorsement from George A. Romero himself.

The Blob (1988)

The Blob

Release Date: 1988

Rating: * * *

By John Engell August 15, 2012

  

As the proverbial saying goes, we all have to start somewhere. For A-list Hollywood director Frank Darabont, the man responsible for one of cinema’s greatest achievements, “The Shawshank Redemption,” and more recently for adapting the “Walking Dead” comics into a hit television program, that beginning came as a screenwriter.    

Darabont’s first feature length writing credit was 1987’s slasher sequel “A Nightmare On Elm Street 3: Dream Warriors.” A year later, Darabont would re-team with Chuck Russell, the director of that film, and together they would pen the screenplay for “The Blob.”

The blob is a purple jelly-like substance that first appears in what is believed to be a meteorite that has crashed in the small rural town of Arborville, California. After a local vagabond strays too close to the crater, he is attacked by the bubbling life form within. Bad-boy biker Brian Flagg attempts to help the man, but the crazed vagrant is nearly run over by football star Paul Taylor, who is on his first date with beautiful high school cheerleader Meg Penny. The couple rush the man to the hospital, but it is too late. The unidentified mass has claimed its first victim. Meg’s date then ends rather abruptly when Paul is promptly devoured by the blob, which by this point has grown from the size of a spilled jar of jam to something that fills a small room. 

By the time police show up, led by overwhelmed and understaffed Sheriff Herb Geller (frequent Darabont collaborator Jeffrey DeMunn), the blob has literally slipped out the back door, headed towards Main Street where the townspeople are being unceremoniously herded at gunpoint like sheep by a FEMA like body, to the local church. 

“The Blob” is nothing we haven’t seen before. After all it is a remake of the Steve McQueen movie of the same name, made 30 years earlier. It is reminiscent of George Romero’s “The Crazies” and countless others. Government agents in white hazmat suits and gas masks quickly show up and quarantine the unsuspecting small town. “No one gets in, no one gets out,” says Dr. Christopher Meddows, the man at the forefront of this secret military operation gone awry. He has come to contain the life form, not destroy it. He wants to study it for use in biological warfare, even at the expense of the citizens of Arborville, whom he calls “expendable.” Of course there is one local who won’t go quietly, in this case Flagg, who recognizes the blob’s one apparent weakness and works, with the help of Penny, to exploit it before the entire town is consumed. 

The cast puts in fine performances (although the talented DeMunn is criminally underused and is eliminated from proceedings far too early on), nevertheless the real star of the film is its special effects which have aged remarkably well. Despite nearly 25 years of industry advancements, the practical special effects in “The Blob” are as impressive as anything the big studios pay big money for today. And I have yet to see anything CGI that captures “The Blob’s” visceral realness. 

The film flopped at the box office. According to IMDB “The Blob” only grossed $8 million, which was less than half of its budget, and almost a million dollars less than its effects cost alone. 

Despite its poor theatrical performance, “The Blob” has grown (no pun intended) to be a fan boy favorite. I now include myself in that group. Good campy fun from people who clearly worked hard to create an entertaining movie with laughs and real scares.

Critters (1986)

Critters 

Release Date: 1986

Rating: * * 1/2

By John Engell August 8, 2012 
 
Many horror films claim to be an homage to a past classic. Most however, are blatant plagiaristic rip-offs intended to profit from a successful brethren. Stephen Herek’s 1986 horror-comedy “Critters” would likely fall into the latter category, though it is not without its merits.

“Critters” begins in a faraway place in space where creatures called the Krites are bound for termination on an alien penal planet. But before the Krites can be executed they hijack a fueled-up ship and make a break for the nearest habitable planet, which just so happens to be Earth. Shape shifting bounty hunters are sent to retrieve the prisoners in a race across the galaxy.

“Critters” is said to be New Line Cinema’s answer to Warner Brothers’ “Gremlins.” At the time New Line was a fledgling American film studio that had only come to prominence two years earlier with its first commercial success in Wes Craven’s “A Nightmare on Elm Street;” A film which was made for a song, but grossed millions.
 
New Line would employ the same low budget ingenuity as its riposte to Spielberg’s 1984 blockbuster. With only $2 million to work with, California’s Chiodo brothers were hired to create the film’s namesakes. The Krites share their distant green cousin’s gregarious appetite and unfriendly disposition, yet they look somewhat like Sega’s Sonic the Hedgehog, with red eyes and a bad attitude, and are armed with poisonous porcupine-like projectiles.

Genre vet Dee Wallace (“The Howling”) stars as the matron of the secluded Kansas farmhouse were the Krites take refuge once they crash land their stolen ship. After father and son discover the wreck the film becomes rather light on plot and particularly heavy on action, as the soldiers comically search the small town, including the local church and bowling alley, for the Krites who are busy terrorizing the farm’s family. “Critters” is relatively subdued, although a young Billy Zane (“Titanic”) gets offed off-screen and one of the Krites humorously drops an F-Bomb. There is little blood, but there are some solid explosions thanks to the son’s homemade firecrackers and the soldier’s futuristic weapons.

“Critters” features no elaborate sets, no large ensemble cast,  and no effects that couldn’t be whipped up in someone’s garage. “Critters” may be the poor man’s version of “Gremlins,” but with its unassuming charm, this clone has found its own cult following.

Gremlins 2: The New Batch (1990)

Gremlins 2: The New Batch

Release Date: 1990

Rating: * *

By John Engell August 1, 2012

Six years after the release of Joe Dante’s seminal classic “Gremlins,” Warner Brothers convinced the reluctant director to return for its sequel by offering him complete creative control of the picture and a very liberal budget.

Come summer 1990 “Gremlins 2: The New Batch” was unleashed on American moviegoers to little fanfare. With a budget of $50 million, nearly five times that of the original, “The New Batch” was a bona fide box office bomb, bringing in a paltry $41 million in receipt revenue domestically; roughly a fourth of its predecessor’s bounty. Dante attributed the film’s financial failure to the franchise’s lengthy layoff and thus its inability to capitalize on its own success.

Regardless, Dante’s follow-up effort feels rushed. The film rejoins hero Billy Peltzer ( Zach Galligan) and his new fiance Kate (the stunning Phoebe Cates), who have left the comfort and tranquility of small town Kingston Falls for the sprawling ambiguity of the big city (in this case, the Big Apple). The transplants have given up banking for work with media mogul Daniel Clamp’s Clamp Enterprises. Billy is now a commercial artist and Kate a tour guide in the same high-tech corporate skyscraper.

The building also houses, amongst other oddities, an animal experimentation laboratory where the Mogwai Gizmo is conveniently being caged after his master dies and he is captured wandering the city’s streets by one of the lab’s scientists. It’s not long before Billy gets wind of his old furry friend’s imprisonment and frees Gizmo, who then as a matter of course gets wet and replicates. The new Mogwai that are produced are caricatures of their former 1984 selves, as are the gremlins they metamorphosize into after enjoying a late night snack at one of the center’s eateries.

Yes, it is farfetched for even this type of fare, and the film quickly becomes as chaotic as its namesake as the creatures continue to multiply and take over the high-rise in a series of increasingly outlandish gags. Police tape off the building, but Billy and his former neighbor Murray Futterman(character actor and Dante regular Dick Miller), who is in town visiting, are on the inside and must stop the monsters before dark when they can escape into New York.

“Gremlins 2: The New Batch,” is an hour and 46 minute long love letter to the fans of the first installment, yet ironically it lacks much of the violence, and crude humor that made the original a blockbuster and a staple of the horror-comedy sub-genre. The gremlins, once genuinely scary, act like something out of a Sunday morning cartoon, as both Dante and Stephen Spielberg, who reprised his role as executive producer on the project, favored a more family friendly film that was less dark and more slapstick than the original. It is interesting to note that although the sequel is oft considered the tamer of the two films, it received a harsher MPAA assessment than its predecessor did because the PG-13 rating did not exist when “Gremlins” was released (although it did help facilitate its creation).

Perhaps “Gremlins 2’s” saving grace is its satirical, self-referential script. In one scene for example, characters debate the inherent flaws and potential inconsistencies in the logic of the Mogwai’s 3 golden rules i.e. The creatures can’t eat after midnight, but what would happen if they traveled between time zones? In another scene we see famous film critic Leonard Maltin deliver his real and scathing review of the first “Gremlins” film, before being attacked by the green little monsters.

Dante acknowledges that we are only watching a movie when at one point the celluloid appears to melt and the screen goes blank and it’s revealed that gremlins have removed the “New Batch’s” reel from the projector, temporarily putting a stop to proceedings in the cinema where the picture is being screened. Then in a rather hokey, but fun cameo, Hulk Hogan pops up and proclaims that we the audience have paid good money to see the film and he then threatens the gremlins until we once again pick up with the action.

There is even a nod to city legend Frank Sinatra as the gremlins have a New Year’s-esque celebration in the  Clamp building’s lobby complete with a rousing rendition of New York, New York.   
 
Ultimately, “Gremlins 2: The New Batch” is an entertaining if unnecessary sequel that thankfully does not damage the legacy of its groundbreaking forefather, but does little to add to it either.